Wednesday, April 27, 2011

It's Official- I am an Embarrassment to my Child

Nate is running track this season, and has practice on Mondays and Wednesdays. On Wednesdays, there's also an exercise class that I go to after school. A mom from school who's a personal trainer is doing a "bootcamp" with some of the teachers, and I've joined the group. Usually we're kind of off to the side, doing stations like jumping rope, mountain climbers, pushups, and dips. Things that don't look too funny, or least things that Nate can ignore without too much effort. But this week, she had us using the track more, doing plyometrics like "power skipping". I knew that Nate would be horrified by this. I knew it. The woman I was talking to said, "What? He's not even going to notice you." She has 2 boys, but they're only 6 and 4 years old, and the idea that her sons would either notice or care about their mom doing exercise is not on her radar yet.

Then Nate and his teammates ran by.  A pretty 7th grade girl in the group ran by, pointedly not looking at me, wearing the funniest look on her face, like the proverbial cat that swallowed the canary.  She's a friend of Nate's. And I knew... She was delighting in the spectacle of Nate's mom, skipping around the track, swinging her arms like a madwoman trying to frighten the crows away.

There were other embarrassing things we had to do. Embarrassing if you happen to be a twelve year old with an image to protect. We paired off at one point to play "foot tag"- where you were supposed to chase your opponent, trying to tag her toes with yours. I looked down to the other end of the field, where Nate was supposed to be practicing, and I could tell, I could Just Tell that in fact he was watching this game with horror. My partner said "He's not even going to notice." She has an 18 month old. She clearly has no idea what's coming.

After practice, Nate was sitting in the lobby at school. I sat next to him and a friend of his, waiting for Kent. It was quiet for a few minutes. Then Nate looked straight ahead, and said "Mom, is there any OTHER day you could practice at the track? Like, some day that my friends and I aren't going to be there to see it." He wouldn't even look at me.  I explained that the class was on Wednesday, and that was the only day.  I also pointed out that the team did some funny stretches too, and it was just part of the class.

He looked pained. "Skipping??? Seriously, Mom,  SKIPPING? And what was that thing you were doing with your arms, and that other thing where you were dancing around with that other person, moving your butt around...." he trailed off, too disturbed to continue.

His friend Dani was pointedly looking down, trying to swallow a grin. I decided a good offense was the best defense. "But Sweetie- Aren't you PROUD of me?? I was the BEST and the FASTEST skipper there!!" I winked at Dani, who looked up in confusion. (huh? She's not denying it?). I said "Dani, wouldn't you be proud if your mom was the best skipper in the class?" (wink) He laughed and said "Sure; I'd be really proud of my mom!" Then he said, "I gotta go- see you tomorrow." and made a quick exit. Nate was horrified. There was no getting around it. Horr-i-fied.

But, I'm going to that class. Every week. Get used to it, dude.

7 comments:

Ry said...

Good for you Jane!! Your son will be fine, I should know, I'm someone's son who had these moments too. He will come around and it's good character building! Good for you for sticking it out! Oh and he's proud of you.. just can't say the words right now... here from the Fibro.. great blog!

Alison said...

I frequently embarrass my 15 year old daughter. It's usually to do with my musical tastes which are similar to her and her friends. What makes the situation funnier is that her friends think I'm a 'cool' mum and I'm friends with them all on Twitter and Facebook!
(weekend rewind)

HeeWho said...

I recently turned 40. A friend came over early that morning and wrote "One hot 40 year old!" with paint pen on my wind shield. I took it in the stride and went about my day. I forgot what it said until I pulled up in front of school to pick up my son, who was waiting with 2 of his female classmates. When I noticed they were laughing, he was quick to tell me why. Guess I deserved that one.

Life In A Pink Fibro said...

Oh, I dread these days. My boys are 7 and 4 and still like to have me around. I'm not looking forward to the bit where I embarrass them... because I just know that I am SO going to embarrass them.

Thanks for Rewinding at the Fibro.

ej said...

This reminds me of an episode of "Modern Family" when the mother embarrases the daughter at the mall so mom decides to yell this in front of daughter's friends to get back at her:

Alex, honey, when you're out shopping, you might want to pick yourself up a training bra. I know you don't need one now but your little boobies are going to come in soon. Mommy loves you, kitten!

Gotta love sassy moms! Excellent work, best skipper in class. :)

Mila said...

Dropping in from Rewind to say hello.
Your son will recover, and even if you are a celebrity like Angelina Jolie, when you are a mom, you will undoubtedly embarrass your children. It's the law of the universe or something :p
Mila from http://hereundertherainbow.blogspot.com/

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